When we hear someone begin a sentence with "if I were you," our first response is often to think (or say!) "Well, you're not me." The problem is that people often don't try to understand what it is like to be us: they just imagine themselves in our situation with all of their history, their connections, their skills and their biases.
- has your physiology shifted to match their posture, gestures and expressions?
- has your language shifted to take on their choice of words, phrasing, rhythms and sounds?
- are you seeing yourself in the picture (in the way that they can see you?)